
My view of the world is not an honest view because my expectations interfere. My ego inserts itself into every unconscious and conscious perspective. I create altered realities for bending the world I see toward addressing my wants. This constant aspiration engenders a manipulative restlessness within my persona. I look, see, expect and act accordingly, never finding the time or mental resilience to resist. Never engaging with the appreciation of a moment or the truth of where I am.
The more I understand this, the more I seek to stop, observe, contemplate and appreciate. I try to place myself differently in the world, as within rather than without, as an internal part rather than an external entity, as influenced rather than influencer. I think this practice is helping.